A heavy weight is coming down, flattening me, pushing me down. A big weight. Then a cool breeze. I'm pushing my way through a wind tunnel, an enormous
force is pushing against me. After I make my way through it, I'm in a light, open space. It's as though I've gone from one room to another. No part of
me is enclosed, encapsulated. I had to push against the wind that was pushing against me in order to get into the next room. I feel all of the
different parts of my body. Sometimes I feel just the very tip of my nose, like a little block of wood. My legs feel really heavy. I don't feel
anything under my hands (which are across my belly). I just feel them. Sometimes my body is just gone.
A cool breeze comes now and then. My lower a= feel deep, I can feel the insides of my bones. It feels wonderful. I'm surprised that my mind is still
here. I don't feel anything scary. It all seems familiar, like home. I'm home. I'm going home. It's deep, floaty. I'm going. Wonderful. I feel my
bones. I might throw up, my stomach is not upset but there is a little knot. I might throw up this knot that I am holding. Everything is nice, feels
wonderful, I'm going. I'm surprised that my mind still works.
An awareness of being here, beyond here. Both. The setting is important. Very deep, very far, galaxies, very far out there. Spacious, open, dark. Some
visual patterns, thin lines of bright colors, rapidly changing. Mostly floating, like a baby through the universe. That's what it feels like.
Floating through existence. Infinite, the whole universe. All that space and me. Never ending, floating through it. I'm home, finally I'm home. My
legs are more trembly now. I'm sweaty and I want to stretch out.
I didn't think about myself. It was beyond ego, beyond my personality. I couldn't believe that the experience lasted four hours. Questions about where
I was seemed not to apply. It was great. Thank you. Real gratitude, I was always wanting to thank you. I felt so grateful. I loved the feeling of the
wind tunnel. The best image I have is of a baby floating through the universe. I felt like liquid, like water. I felt like home. I remember what
Augustine said. Something about the heart always being restless until it finds its rest in God. I felt that complete rest, no searching, finally
home.
Deep, far-away galaxies, a spacious, open, dark, floating existence in the infinite, whole universe. Wonderful.
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